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Ghosts N Goblins
Ghosts N Goblins is the fifth episode of season 1 of The Irate Gamer. The long list of doublethink commited by The Irate Gamer can be seen here Plot Synopsis Chris Bores reviews Ghost N Goblins and condemns the game thus establishing a firm living quarters in hell and infamy. The Devil would become great friends with Chris Bores and Chris would move out of hell to live in Ironic hell the current location of Chris Bore's house. High Detail plot summary Irate Gamer makes a review of Ghosts'n Goblins on NES. He begins the review by stating “'When you think of one of the most hardest games for the NES, I '' 'guarantee Ghosts N Goblins is probably on your Top 5 List” reminding viewers of exactly what kind of show they are watching. Irate Gamer states that the story that involves a princess being kidnapped and a knight to go save her as “'This is some heavy shit!'” demonstrating Chris's high standards for video game plots. Irate Gamer then asks Lucifer to take The Wicker Man remake with Nicholas Cage to hell with the princess so that Irate Gamer can enjoy them on his privately reserved estate “'Well, as long as he’s on his way down to Hell, can he take the movie Wicker Man starring Nicholas Cage along down with him?'". "That movie was the biggest piece of shit I ever SAW!" says Chris Bores, Master of comparisons and relevancy. It should be noted that the Irate Gamer show has lower score on IMDB than the wickerman does. Given Chris's competitive attitude, its likely that Chris has spotted his closest rival and has now moved to sabotage them by word of mouth. Irate Gamer explains that the armor for King Arthur is extremely weak given that it can only take one hit before falling off. Chris Bores states that the game's downside is that you can only take two hits before your character dies thereby making a game, something that he a 'gamer' cannot appreciate. As Chris repeatedly slams into enemies because he deems it immoral to kill entities that can fight back, Chris states that there is too many enemies and in addition to him dying all the time; having too many enemies makes him die even more. Shortly after this explanation the map screen for arcade version of the game is shown. Chris is then shown frantically trying to not suck at the arcade version of Ghosts and goblins and ensures this by turning on cheats that prevent him from losing his armor after being hit. This is also a demonstration of the recurring theme in that Chris Bores disrespects and outright misrepresents material to the audience; the arcade game was claimed to be apart of the capcom collection but its clear he used a mame emulator as there are no cheats for that version. After the Irate Gamer inevitably dies in the game, the screen pans over to Lucifer laughing at his predicament while negotiating the terms of Irate Gamer's contract for deed. After showing more gameplay from the arcade version of the game, Irate Gamer notes that outside of the many items available to help the player, there are no items such as the mushroom from mario or the heart from castlevannia which can heal the player. This makes his claims as being a castlevannia fan even more dubious as hearts do not heal the player in any of the games. Chris repeats that you can only take two hits before your dead and the only other weapon is the firetorch which sucks because Chris is already flaming so a fire based weapon is futile. Chris forgets to mention the axe or the dagger which are also weapons the player can use. Irate Gamer then lists out the names of all the enemies reminding himself that he is to avoid those enemies and not to constantly collide with them. Irate Gamer then calls in his kid cousin Joey, a hideous man child suspiciously similar in all aspects to Chris, who gets much farther in the first level of the game but still dies and says the game is too difficult. Chris then establishes a running gag for attentive viewers when he says “'You’ll find that each level is harder then the next, if you can believe that'.” which has become the primary evidence for why Chris is not a gamer. According to Chris a good game is one that is never hard, never has the player to do anything worthwhile but paradoxically is fun to play. It is also worth noting that what chris stated, that each level is harder than the one after it, makes no sense because then that would mean the levels near the end of the game are easy since there are no levels after it. This would also mean the game is easier as you progress as the next level is harder then the one after it so the one after the level you just got to is easier. This is a strong element in Chris Bore's piss poor parody in that he never uses any statement properly and often says things that make no sense. This is one of the many times Chris would contradict what he actually means to say in the review. It is up to the audience to decide whether Chris is so stupid as to confuse himself or so intoxicated from stupidty so as to confuse to himself. Irate Gamer now talks about something entirely different saying that “'One annoying thing is these annoying eyeball platforms.'”. Irate Gamer accidentally leads Arthur into the pits of hell several times in an attempt to make the two room-mates. Irate Gamer sucessfully beats the game but is notified that he has not truly beaten the game and must now beat the game a second time to get the true ending. Irate Gamer says "let's blow this thing and go home" shortly before destroying the final boss which is odd considering that Irate Gamer at home considering that he is fighting the devil who resides in hell. He notes the bad ending text that he finds it difficult to read the small words as they are complicated and small. Lucifer mocks Irate Gamer one last time before Irate Gamer summons his satanic powers to destroy the holy game. Trivia *This is the first time Satan and cousin Joey make appearance. *Parts of the game in the review is taken from the arcade game. And invincibility is clearly used. *The complaint of the misspelling is similar to The Angry Video Game Nerd's complaint to Ghostbusters for NES. *Irate Gamer clearly uses satanic powers to destroy the game. This may be forshadowing of a sort. External links *Ghosts N Goblins at The Internet Movie Database Video Category:The Irate Gamer season 1 episodes Category:The Irate Gamer episodes